What would Beyoncé do?
“What is your aspiration in life? My aspiration in life is to be happy”
There is something so crippling about not being able to express yourself… not being able to be you. Losing someone you love makes you think hard and reflect back on all the things you could have done, said and shown that person. You realise your flaws, you realise you made mistakes but most importantly you learn and you challenge the things you did wrong. The growth and the journey through life makes us the people we are, makes me the person I am. It’s not healthy to expect perfection because the reality is that it doesn’t exist. I’ve learned that I don’t want to never be satisfied. It’s not a healthy way to live. Setting the bar to what you expect and raising it more and more each time is chasing an impossible dream. I realise now that life is what you make it, not what you expect it to be like. There has to be balance and that is a constant struggle. Balance in life, in your relationships, in your work. Happiness is not about dedicating yourself to one part of your life, one person. It is about knowing who you are, accepting yourself, flaws and all, fighting for what you want out of life and most importantly, living it.
“I’ve set myself a goal, and that goal is independence”
Looking back I lost the independent woman I’d grown up being because I enjoyed the feeling of having someone there who I could trust to depend on. And that mistake I hope to learn from. I fought so hard to be where I am today, determined to make it on my own and have my independence. I had faith in myself that I would get through all the challenges and obstacles that life throws at us. Then I fell in love and I realised how much easier life could be when you had someone there to share it with. Someone who could fight your corner, support you, someone you could rely on and I got too comfortable with that. I took advantage, my biggest regret and lost sight of myself. It is only now I realise that I lost the fighter in me who doesn’t need to rely on anyone but myself to make me happy. I lost who I was because I thought I needed someone else to live my life. I thought I needed someone else to make me happy but when you look at your life there are relationships, jobs, experiences that all make up the dots but it’s you who holds the cards, the choices on how you live it. Only you can make you happy.
“Life is but a dream”
Hindsight is a beautiful thing. The best thing about looking back is realising how incredible life is and if you don’t take time to think about it and appreciate it, you’ll never really live it. You’ll never realise that all the dots are connected and that each day makes up a tiny part of you and your journey through life. Life never turns out how we expect it to be and that is why instead of expecting we should be living. Each day teaches us something different. We learn and we grow. We experience the bad and the good but knowing ourselves and knowing that we are all we need in life is a power that keeps us strong. Life is unpredictable and you never know what is coming next but I do know that I’m ready for it. I’m stronger, I’m wiser, I am myself.
We are all playing a part in a much greater show and that’s what life is… it’s the greatest show on earth.